


not on my watch

by softlyfeather



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Last Night on Earth, M/M, One Night Stand, dean definitely has a thing for angels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 22:42:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28768029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softlyfeather/pseuds/softlyfeather
Summary: what if Dean had made good on that promise to not let Cas die a virgin?(takes place during season 5 episode 3)
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 12
Kudos: 75





	not on my watch

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by a post asking what if cas and dean had gotten it on after the brothel scene in 5x3. fair warning, the ending is sad. because obviously they still have a lot of canon before anything else goes on between them. so this is a one time thing.

“It’s been a long time since I laughed that hard. It’s been more than a long time… years.” Cas cocked his head and caught the hint of sadness in Dean’s expression hiding behind that revelation. It was true. He’d never seen Dean this carefree. Though, something told him that it wasn’t as genuine as it appeared. 

Dean had been in the midst of opening the impala’s driver side door, but now he turned and crossed his arms, resting them on the hood of the car, looking at Cas with an unreadable expression on his face. Cas mirrored him and also leaned his arms on the hood. After a moment of eye contact Dean finally spoke, his voice oddly soft. “So. What are we going to do about you?”

Cas frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I said I wouldn’t let you die a virgin. Practically swore to it.” 

“It doesn’t matter.”

Dean shook his head, chin resting on his arm. “It matters.” He shoved off the hood and got into the impala. Cas followed, confused. 

Silence filled the car as they drove. Cas side eyed Dean but he seemed deep in thought. Then they suddenly pulled into a hotel parking lot. Dean parked the car and then didn’t move but to rub his hands on his thighs. He finally took a breath and let out a rushed question, “Whataboutme?”

Cas squinted at him. “Dean?”

Dean took another deep breath, staring straight out the windshield into the hedge that ran along the parking lot. “What about me?”

“I don’t understand.” Cas understood. But he didn’t dare believe it. He had to be wrong.Misinterpreting some strange human reference perhaps. 

Dean’s knee started bouncing and he growled in frustration. “God, Cas, I mean do you want to sleep with me.”

Cas’s heart leapt into his throat. He’d been terrified at the brothel. It was so very far from what he wanted. What he **really** wanted. But he hadn’t thought that it was possible. It had always been made clear. Dean wasn’t into men. Surely Dean was just feeling guilty that he’d made a promise to him and wasn’t able to pull through. He couldn’t possibly want… him. 

He didn’t realize that he hadn’t actually answered until Dean ran a hand over his face and sighed. “Forget it. I was just k-”

Cas didn’t let him finish. He laid a hand on Dean’s arm and Dean’s head snapped up, his eyes full of question. “I would not be against it.”

Dean was quiet for a moment before his mouth twitched upwards and he huffed. “Wow, way to make a girl feel wanted, Cas.” 

Cas let his thumb rub over Dean’s sleeve. “I do.” 

The teasing mask on Dean’s face fell away and he looked at Cas with wide eyes. “Come on.” The speed with which he exited the car surprised Cas, and he followed at a slightly more subdued pace. 

By the time he reached Dean, the room was already booked. A keycard flew through the air and Cas caught it instinctively before giving Dean a curious look. Dean grinned, “I’ll meet you up there. Room 304.” 

“Okay.” Cas wasn’t sure why they weren’t going up together but he trusted Dean to return so he took the elevator up to the third floor alone. Opening the door to the room revealed a large bed and wide windows which gave a view which wasn’t entirely thrilling considering they were in Maine. Though the lights of the town still twinkled pleasingly. Cas ran his hands up and down the sides of his trench coat anxiously. Was this really happening? As the door lock clicked behind him he turned to see Dean waving a small bottle in the air.

“I love that they have lube in vending machines now. Damned convenient.” He set the bottle down on the bedside table and took off his jacket, throwing it on the nearby chair. Cas wasn’t sure what to do and just stood at the end of the bed. Dean swaggered over and smiled but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Another mask. “Relax, Cas.” He took Cas’s coat by the lapels and eased it off of him before tossing it onto the chair with his. 

Cas rubbed his thumbs along his fingertips. “Are you sure, Dean?” 

Tension was apparent in Dean’s jaw. He stepped closer and rested his hands on Cas’s shoulders. “Yes. If you’re going to…” he swallowed, “not be here tomorrow-”

Cas raised his hands and wrapped them around Dean’s wrists, watching as Dean’s pupils grew. “I am prepared. Though, still hoping that perhaps I am wrong.” 

Dean gave a very small nod and they just watched each other for a moment. Saying what they couldn’t with their eyes. Cas let his thumbs brush over Dean’s pulse points, feeling the steady beat of his heart. Inhaling quickly, Dean fell into him, crushing their lips together and pulling Cas roughly against him. The feeling was almost overwhelming. After so long of holding back, and pulling away, having Dean almost nuzzling his nose into his cheek while his plush lips pressed into his was… amazing. He found his arms wrapping around Dean’s waist, pulling them even closer as he kissed Dean back, revelling in all the sensations. The clean, fresh scent of Dean always tinged with a hint of leather filled his nose and felt like sparks running over his skin. Tingles spreading from the back of his neck where Dean was running his hand up into his hair made goosebumps prickle along his arms. It reminded him of flying in a thunderstorm. 

Dean’s warm tongue licked at his lips and he moaned, opening to him. He licked into Dean’s mouth, relishing the feel of their tongues sliding against each other. The taste of Dean was sinful and he couldn’t get enough. Grinding his hips into Dean, he could clearly feel that they were both very much aroused. Dean gasped into his mouth and Cas swallowed it with a smile and a kiss before pulling back to look at him. Dean’s green eyes were almost completely dark with pupil, searching his in question as he panted, “Cas?” His voice was breathy in a way Cas had never heard before and there was no mask hiding anything anymore. God, **this** , this was what he had wanted. 

He growled, “Dean,” and pushing him onto the bed behind him. Dean bounced slightly as he hit the bed, he looked surprised but then smiled and bit his bottom lip as Cas threw off his suit jacket, closely followed by his shirts. Dean sat up and pulled off his over-shirt, as Cas reached down and helped him pull off his t-shirt underneath. Their arms tangled slightly and Dean laughed, the sound only increasing the warmth in Cas’s chest. He leaned down over Dean’s body and Dean lunged up to capture his mouth, his hands running over Cas’s bare back, and it was Dean’s turn to swallow Cas’s moan. The feeling of Dean’s hands caressing his shoulder blades, rubbing at where his wings would be made him quiver in pleasure. Dean rocked up into Cas chasing friction against him and Cas rested his forehead against Dean’s. He pressed Dean down into the bed as he wiggled his way in between Dean’s legs. Dean automatically wrapped his legs around Cas’s thighs and suddenly their lengths were completely aligned and the slightest motion sent heat running through Cas’s core. 

He let out a groan and Dean huffed a laugh. “I’m not going to last long if you keep making noises like that, Cas.” 

“Pants, off, now.” Cas demanded. 

Dean laughed, “Yes, sir.” Cas rolled off to the side and took off his pants and boxers in one swift movement before flinging his socks to the floor. Dean naked was… stunning. To see him bare before him spread a pleasant ache through his chest. Grabbing the small bottle off of the table, Dean handed it to Cas. “You want to prep me? Just… go slow. I’ve uh, never done this before.” 

Cas just stared. First he had assumed that Dean was not into men. Then when Dean offered this, he’d assumed that Dean must have done this before. But this… this he hadn’t expected. “Dean… are you sure?” 

Dean ran his hand along Cas’s jaw. “Ya. If it’s going to be anyone, it’s gonna be you, Cas.” He felt like his heart would burst. That Dean was giving this to him… it meant more than words could say. So he settled for pulling Dean to him so that he could kiss him deeply, infusing it with gratitude, awe, and love. This was more than he could have ever possibly hoped for. 

They parted, breathing heavily. Cas pressed the bottle back into Dean’s hand, “Can you show me how?” 

Cas only managed to watch for about a minute before he was desperate to do it himself. Seeing his fingers disappear inside Dean was something he couldn’t find words for. Though, the sounds that Dean was making described it well enough. Curling his fingers slightly, he watched in amazement as Dean’s cock got even harder and he shook on the bed. “Cas, please, I need you.”

Hearing Dean’s wrecked voice triggered something inside him. Dean needed him. He slid up Dean’s chest and kissed him softly, lining himself up with his entrance. Running his hand over Dean’s tattoo, he asked again, to soothe the last anxious thought at the back of his mind, “You’re sure?”

Dean took Cas’s face in his hands, making him meet his eyes. A line of worry creased Dean’s brow. “Cas, do **you** want this?” 

Cas breathed out, “More than anything.” 

The line vanished as Dean smiled. “Good, me too.” He kissed him softly. “Now get the fuck in me already, Angel.”

Dean’s words made Cas’s hips obediently thrust all on their own, the head of his cock swallowed by Dean’s heat. They gasped into each others mouths, pupils blown wide. Cas eased himself in slowly, letting Dean grab his hips to pull him in at his own pace. When he finally bottomed out and felt the base of his shaft flush against Dean he moaned in pleasure. He was inside Dean. They were one. 

It reminded him of when he’d found Dean in hell and first laid his hand on him. Dean’s soul had felt so familiar that he couldn’t help pulling it close and feeling a sudden connection with it. Dean was his, just as he was Dean’s. Not to possess but to worship, body and soul. 

Dean’s hand stroking along his neck brought him back from his thoughts. His eyes were wide with wonder. “God, Cas. I didn’t think it would feel like this.”

“Is it bad?” Cas was concerned. 

Dean smiled so softly and it made Cas’s heart clench. “No. It’s goddamn amazing. I just… feel all of you. And I don’t just mean your cock. But speaking of- I’m definitely going to need you to move soon.”

Cas’s hips seemed directly connected to Dean’s commands as they moved again on their own, pulling out and pushing back in. Dean clutched at his back, pulling him closer as he tilted his hips up, moving with him. Cas rocked into him, chasing all of those beautiful noises that Dean gasped into his mouth. Dean’s hand snaked between them to touch himself and Cas growled. He pushed Dean’s hand away and replaced it with his own, stroking Dean in time with his thrusts. Dean was going to come because of **him**. “Oh fuck, Cas, yes,” Dean groaned and tucked his head into Cas’s neck, sucking kisses up to his jaw. Cas felt so full and complete, fit to burst. Dean pausing in his kisses and gasped lightly, “Cas… you’re glowing.”

“It’s fine,” he stroked Dean faster, feeling his grace burning bright, clearly some was leaking out. The air was electric and he wasn’t at all surprised when a flash of lightning lit the room. 

Dean’s eyes widened in the sudden light, “Oh god, your wings.” Cas tipped his hips higher and hit that spot deep inside Dean. Dean’s legs tightened around him and he shouted as his seed spilled between Cas’s fingers. Cas followed soon after, collapsing onto Dean’s chest. 

Dean gently rolled Cas to the side and reached to the other side table which had tissues on it. He wiped himself down and handed some to Cas. 

Tissues thrown on the floor for future them to worry about, they settled under the covers. After a moment of staring at the ceiling, Dean breathed out. “So… how was that for a first time?” 

“I could easily ask you the same.”

“Don’t avoid the question, Cas.”

“It was…” Luminescent, glorious, heavenly, sinful, delectable, rapturous… “indescribable.” 

He felt Dean turn towards him, “In a good way?”

Cas faced him as well. “Yes,” he couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face. 

“I have **never** had sex like that before.”

“In a good way?”

Dean grinned back. “In a good way.” He reached out and took Cas’s hand in his. He brought it up and pressed his soft lips to Cas’s knuckles, green eyes looking into his the entire time. They were shining with unshed tears. Cas felt an ache in his chest at the sight. After a quick squeeze to his hand, Dean closed his eyes, “We should try and get a few hours sleep before that sunrise ritual.” 

Cas reached out and pulled Dean into his chest, his head tucked into Dean’s hair. Dean hesitated for a second before wrapping his arms tightly around Cas. “Sleep well, Dean,” Cas breathed.

He didn’t sleep. Dean didn’t either from what Cas could tell from his ragged breaths against his chest. As the darkness changed to a deep blue from the coming sunrise, Cas ran his hand along Dean’s back. “We should get ready.” 

Dean squeezed him, burying his face into Cas’s neck and taking a deep breath before pulling away and sitting on his side of the bed, facing away from Cas. He let Dean have a moment. Today wasn’t going to be easy. 

That night, they had actually managed to capture Raphael, and he was not pleased. Tensions were high and despite Dean’s quips, Cas knew he was feeling anxious. Raphael reminded Dean of when Zachariah had given him stomach cancer and said that he had a much better imagination. Dean threw Cas a look. And it broke him. Dean was terrified. It hit him all at once. If this was how the others were manipulating him already just knowing Dean was his friend, it would only get ten times worse if they knew what Dean really meant to him. He couldn’t put Dean at risk like that. Not for anything.

He turned to leave. “I’ll find you, Castiel,” Raphael rasped.

Cas whirled back, filling his voice with the frustration he was feeling, “Maybe one day. But for now, you’re my little bitch.” He stormed out.

But not fast enough to miss Dean adding, “What he said.” Cas clutched at his chest, Dean’s voice sounded so proud. Of **him**. 

They were driving down the freeway and Cas was lost in thought. They shouldn’t have slept together. It would have been easier to not know. To not know what it was like. What it could be like. His whole body felt heavy and sore. Why did this have to hurt so much?

“Hey, you okay?” Dean’s voice was concerned and it only made Cas feel worse. He couldn’t bring himself to answer. Dean started talking about his father and it was clear that he thought Cas was upset about Raphael saying that God was dead. If only it were that simple. He let Dean talk, listening more to his voice than the words he was saying. 

“What do you believe?” 

He supposed that needed an answer. “I believe he’s out there.” 

“Good. Then go find him.” 

Cas finally turned to look at Dean sadly. “What about you?”

“What about me? I don’t know. Honestly, I’m good. I can’t believe I’m saying that, but I am. I’m really good.” Cas had to turn away. His heart was breaking. It didn’t matter how happy Dean was. Cas was no good for him. He’d only get him hurt or killed. It was clear that Dean wanted more, and Cas did too, more than anything… But it wasn’t possible. 

Dean needed to be pushed back to Sam. “Even without your brother?” 

“Especially without my brother. I mean, I spend so much time worrying about the son of a bitch. I mean, I’ve had more fun with you in the past 24 hours than I’ve had with Sam in years. And you’re not that much fun.” 

Dean’s teasing voice tore at Cas’s chest. He didn’t know the words to fix this. He could only do what he always did… 

“It’s funny, you know, I’ve been so chained to my family. But now that I’m alone… hell, I’m happy.” Dean’s hand slid across the seat towards Cas and he vanished. Not turning back to see the disappointed look on Dean’s face. 

***

The sight of the empty seat knocked the air from Dean’s lungs. He’d thought… No. He shook his head. He should’ve known better. He should’ve known it was too good to be true. Why would Cas ever want to stay with him? Everyone leaves. Cas just figured it out quicker than most.

Empty freeway stretching ahead, Dean turned on the radio to occupy his mind and keep the road from blurring with tears.


End file.
